I'm so sorry I've been so long in writing! I've been keeping busy and just haven't taken the time to record my progress. Well, here is a little catch up:
As of this morning, I now weigh 133 pounds! That's a total weight loss of 4 lbs in about 4 weeks! That's been my goal (to lose a pound a week), as steady consistant weight loss has been shown to be the most lasting. A few days ago, I'd measured my waist and had lost 1.25 inches already! A pair of shorts I didn't enjoy wearing when I began this blog because they fit a lot snugger than when I purchased them, have been frequenting my hips this last week. They still don't fit as loose as I'd like them too, but at least now they are comfortable.
As far as workouts of RevAbs goes, I'm still plugging along, though I'm only 2 weeks along in the actual program schedule. Being a perfectionist, I've found this a little hard to deal with. Normally, when I fail at something like that I quit and start over because it has to be right. However, that doesn't mean I haven't been active. Most of the days that I didn't do one of the program's videos, I was very active in other ways, hiking, biking (pitifully so), fishing, etc. Then, when I have no other activities planned, I'll do a DVD of RevAbs.
Diet-wise, I haven't stayed perfect on what I wanted to do with that either. I've splurged more than planned, and admittedly when I had an extremely stressful situation, I grabbed a bag of Double Chocolate Melt Milano Cookies, binged, and promptly purged. That was May 1st, but I've been "sober," as far as my Eating Disorder is concerned, since then.
Again, this process is give and take. That's really tough to mentally figure out anyway, but I found a good link today, that had a phrase pop out at me:
"It is hard to remember we are aiming for balance, not perfection. It is very important for us to claim our successes in achieving balance and attaining perspective, in identifying our needs and in developing more resilient relationships with ourselves, with others and with food."
The above quote has helped me realize that it isn't about eating a super strict diet to be healthy, or having a regimented workout schedule. That's not exactly practical with the kind of life I want to lead and be involved in. It's all about balance, and keeping the set-backs in perspective instead of freaking out like I used to.
Surprisingly, the past couple days I've felt at peace with my body and my eating. I've started actually thinking and believing that I've felt satisfied without the urge to keep eating, and when I do eat a little to much too fast and feel full, while my first instinct is "purge", there is a recognizable voice that says "Why?" I try to answer the question, but the best I can come up with is, "My stomach feels too full, and it will feel better if I do this." The voice then responds, "Relax, and it will get better." So, I decide to listen to the voice, and guess what . . . The voice is right!
I am on my guard however, because this is how I felt last fall/early winter when I thought I was coming out of this for good, then I relapsed. So I'm excited about my progress, but I also know that there is a lot of work ahead, and I'll have good days and bad days continually.
Until next time . . . !!!
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